Chews and Sox

by Marita on January 12, 2012

Post image for Chews and Sox

I sit Heidi on the side of her bed and kneel down to put her socks on, I tickle her toes and say our little rhyme
“one foot, two foot, red foot, blue foot, left foot, right foot”,
she kicks, I dodge.. most days I dodge. It is a ritual, one of many.

Days, weeks, months pass.
“Heidi socks” I point to the picture in her PECs folder and hand her socks.
“one foot, two foot, red foot, blue foot, left foot, right foot” I chant as I pull Heidis socks on.
We repeat the ritual with her shoes.
I’ve learned finally, Heidi sits and I stand, her feet resting on my thigh, now when she kicks it just hits my legs, not my face.
So much for getting down to eye level to communicate, but safety first.
Days, weeks, months pass.
“Heidi shoes and socks” I say pointing to the shoes and socks laid out beside her.
“Heidi chews and sox” she repeats
There are tears, her shoes are on and she is trying to pull socks over them.
“oh Heidi no, socks first”
“Heidi chews and sox”
I point to the picture schedule for getting dressed and as I say the words I realise my error, not shoes and socks… socks and then shoes.

Days, weeks, months pass.
“Heidi socks and shoes” I say pointing to the shoes and socks laid out beside her.
“Dey not bootiful enuff” says Heidi falling face down on the floor in tears.
I find a different pair of mismatched socks which meet with her approval, she lies on the floor staring at the ceiling lost in her thoughts as I slip on her socks.
“Heidi shoes” I say handing her shoes over.
“My chews” her smiles is back as she puts on her shoes.

Days, weeks, months, years pass.
“Heidi socks and shoes.” I say poking my head in her bedroom door and waiting long enough to see her moving to get socks in response.
“Yes Mama” she calls to me.
I come back 5 minutes later, socks are on her hands talking to each other.
“Heidi socks and shoes, on your feet”
“Yes Mama”
I leave and continue my morning jobs. 10 minutes later I poke my head into her bedroom again. Socks are on Heidi’s feet, she is lying on the floor flipping through a book.
“Heidi shoes”
No response, I step in, wave my hand infront of her eyes to break her concentration.
“Heidi shoes”
“’I’m reading”
“Heidi shoes, now.”
I point to her picture schedule “First get dressed, then breakfast, then play”.
Heidi puts her shoes on and goes to breakfast.
It is so easy to get lost in the feelings of frustration each day, the little battles that seem to go nowhere, constantly repeating themselves. Then one day you look back and see just how much has changed.


Today I am linking up with Kate Says Stuff ‘Thankful Thursday’.


katesaysstuff January 12, 2012 at 7:21 am

Oh Marita, your and your girls give me so much hope on the days when I seem to be fruitlessly repeating myself over and over to no avail.


Marita January 12, 2012 at 7:47 am

I was getting frustrated myself but had a flash back to the days when Heidi was a toddler and realised how far we had come.

Veronica January 12, 2012 at 8:04 am

We’re at a similar place with Amy now too – it’s nice to see the years finally having a payoff.

Love this.

Marita January 12, 2012 at 8:21 am

It is wonderful, the growing independence which comes later than for other kids but is so hard won :)

Ai Sakura January 12, 2012 at 8:56 am

Love seeing how she has grown and become more independent. One of the reasons I blog and try to jot down every moment of my girl too – its so easy not to see pass the day but when we look back, we realize what a long way we’ve come from when they were just born!

Rhianna January 12, 2012 at 9:18 am

What a lovely post. Even at the best of times parenting is repetitive and frustrating.

Bernadette January 12, 2012 at 10:02 am


Thank you for sharing this beautiful story. While it is frustrating at the time, it is fantastic to look back and see how far we have come. (Our issue with socks is that she prefers anklets and if it is anything else, lookout! Makes it easier to separate the socks for folding though)

Renee | About a Bugg January 12, 2012 at 9:03 pm

This is a lovely post Marita.

Some days all I feel like I say the same 10 phrases over and over again, so it’s nice to be reminded of how far we have come!

And your girls are gorgeous xx

Dad Blog Tork January 12, 2012 at 9:47 pm

nawww :-)

I look forward when my boy realised socks slide awesomely along tiles hehehehe

lisamareedom January 12, 2012 at 10:25 pm

You have reminded me of when I lived in Brisbane with Liam at the AAQ preschool. Proper Socks and Shoes were only needed for a few months of the year and the BATTLES I had to get them on him each morning. I remember putting gaffa tape over his velcro straps on the shoes to stop him taking them off. And once morning throwing him in the car and driving across Brisbane to get him into school – THEN trying to get the shoes on in the car. Bit me so hard he drew blood.
It is only now I realise that he was communicating as clearly to me as I was to him when he saw the shoes and socks = not very!

He thought that if he didn’t put them on, he could change the course of the day as good days were barefoot and mostly naked. Days of being in a classroom and being told what to do were done in socks and shoes.

Ah to tell that mum I was what I know now…..

Maid In Australia January 25, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Ah yes, the daily shoe battle. I remember it well … Thank goodness those days are mostly behind us, though he still regresses in times of stress, new shoes or uncomfortable socks. And heaven help us if the socks don’t match! I love how patient you are …

Gavin Bollard January 26, 2012 at 7:00 am

Great post. I love the fact that I go to work 5 days a week and miss out on this ritual when it’s time critical (for school).

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